Drop It Like It’s Hot
I think it’s hilarious when people drop names just to impress others. They very casually, very subtly slip it into conversations and attempt to act all nonchalant about it. To give the impression that they and (insert celebrity name) are, in fact, the best of pals.
You can be having a conversation about something as inane as, say, fishing.
Then, all of a sudden, name-dropper will say something like, "Oh yeah, I like fishing. In fact, you know Jessica Alba* likes fishing too? Yeah, she told me. During one of our chats, she told me she goes fishing in Kuala Kubu Baru sometimes. She once caught a fish this big and then let it go."
At that point, you don’t know how to continue the conversation. What should I say? Should I respond with:
a) "Wow, golly gee whiz, you know Jessica Alba*??"
b) "Where’s Kuala Kubu Baru?"
c) "Well, what a fishy tale. Fishy tale, tail…hahha, geddit?? God, I’m lame…hahhaha…um, sorry."
Well, my response was b. Because I really don’t know where the hell Kuala Kubu Baru is but it sounds like there’s definitely a lake there.
Name-dropper then looked kinda crestfallen I hadn’t been at all impressed with his fishy anecdote.
What he didn’t know was that I knew Jessica Alba* wasn’t really his friend or acquaintance, or even the person in the elevator you give a half-nod to because he/she looks kinda familiar and whom you could have been introduced to during a drunken office party where you ended up dancing on the table with a lampshade on your head. Uh, sorry for detracting.
The truth, which the name-dropper’s friend had earlier related to me, was this: Name-dropper was an extra in a TV commercial shoot that Jessica Alba* had the starring role in. The commercial involved fishing or fish, or something like that. And despite being in the same ad, he barely even got within 10 meters of her.
Thus, his quest to impress me by associating himself with Jessica Alba* floundered feebly to a premature death.
And the moral of the story is…don’t mislead people because you never know what they know about you. Secondly, you’re not cool by association. And third of all, no, the celebrity in question is not really Jessica Alba. Go slap yourself in the face with a trout if you really thought so.
*Name has been changed to protect celebrity’s privacy.
May 17th, 2006 at 9:53 am
yeah, i was just thinking the same thing the other day, when i was having a conversation over coffee. John Cusack said he hated the same thing. btw, fishing is a great sport. the other day i caught a huge trout which quite impressed Keanu cos he was kinda speechless.
OK, gotta go. i don’t want to keep Marty Scorsese waiting at the restaurant. talk to you later, Stacy … er, i mean Stephanie.
May 20th, 2006 at 1:29 am
Kuala Kubu Baru is near Ulu Yam. Ulu Yam is near Rawang. Rawang is relatively near to Sg Buloh. Sg Buloh is near Sri Damansara. Sri Damansara is near PJ. So there!
May 20th, 2006 at 8:05 am
Ha ha ha…Steph, Steph. We should have made that trip to Fraser’s Hill. You’ll have to “pergi ke Kuala Kubu, tulis nama atas batu” before reaching The Gap. No, there’s no lake there but rivers which are famous for its white water rafting.